Live Like You Know Your Value
Have you ever paid attention to the words that come out of our mouth? Not just when you're around small kids or your family, but your everyday speech. What are you saying, even when you are “just kidding”, and how do you talk about yourself and those around you?
Throughout college I remember my friends and I always discussing our “big plans.” I think being at University gives you a sense of invincibility, until exams come around. There’s a feeling of anything being possible. You can go anywhere, do anything, be anything, and most of the time people won’t crap on your dreams when you share them. In fact, they’ll encourage you no matter how unrealistic. You want to live across the world, and have zero money, no passport, and have no clue how to apply for a visa? Great! We believe you can do it, because all it takes is wanting something for it to happen right- A community of disillusion.
I’m no pessimist. In fact, I use to live in Neverland myself. You could say I was the mayor, however I’ve recently resigned from my position and I just vacation there in my timeshare. When I think back to all the plans I discussed with my friends, I can say some of my wildest dreams became reality. People would often ask how I was able to do things I was doing. I could not understand what was so “out of the ordinary.” From what I recall, many of us shared the same passions and had similar goals. So why were only a handful of us seeing them come to pass?
It wasn’t until recently that I started thinking about the way I speak about myself in passing and observing the way others speak about themselves. What do they post on social media? What are they liking and identifying with? What “jokes” are they making about themselves, and what is the main topic of conversation when around them? Why did I decide to pay closer attention to these things? Because they are a reflection on how we view ourselves. How you view yourself will in turn affect how you live your life.
Back in college, when I was the Mayor of Neverland, I literally thought that everyone and anyone could achieve anything. I am dead serious you guys. You could have said, “Chantel I’m going to be next greatest tightrope walker and walk across the Grand Canyon without a harness”! And I would have been like, “Woooow that’s amazing! Make sure you practice first and have life insurance, but you go man.”
I still believe anything is possible, however, with conditions. You can achieve whatever you desire, but it will take sacrifice, believing, failure, and being willing to persevere. Even before you get to all of that you have to believe that you are worthy of the life you are trying to live. You must know your value! Not the value the world tries to place on us, but the value given to us by God. We hear it in church all the time, and many of us pray “God help me see myself like you see me.” Whether you’re asking God this to see what needs to be removed from your life, or because you need to know you’re worthy of His love, it’s the idea that you are asking the One who knows you most intimately to reveal apart of yourself that you are unaware of. The creator determines the value of its product, not the other way around, and He says we are fearfully and wonderfully made. Since He knew us while we were being knitted together in our mother’s wombs, don’t you think He knows our values and what, through Him, we can do? (just a thought).
Many of you may only know in part how you truly view yourself, and right now you may be realizing the value you hold for yourself is very small. I noticed a difference in my peers who were always saying they wanted to do or complete xy&z, but never did, and those who seemed to make things happen. It was their speech. I have heard people trash themselves in front of others as if they were sprinting to beat everyone else to the punchline that only existed in their head. We always laugh and play along, but maybe next time we should listen a bit harder and take note. On the opposite end, I have heard people consistently encourage others, but also believe those same encouragements for themselves. There was no question in the minds of those who spoke positively about what they believed they could be or should receive, it was just a matter of navigating their way through where they were and where they wanted to be.
Knowing your value goes beyond achieving external goals. It will affect relationships, your job, your ministry! How many of us like to tell God what we are and are not capable of o_0.
Ask yourself this, if I knew my value as a person, not in an I’m better than anyone else kind of way, but just my own self-worth. Would I still be in the same place I am right now?
Would I be working towards the same goal?
At this same job, or position?
With the same person?
Would I have the same friends?
Would you speak about the person you love most in the world the way you think and speak about yourself?
I’m not writing all of this to tag on to the self-love movement sweeping across social media, or the whole “you do you boo” thing (Actually, I cannot stand that). Having self-worth doesn’t have to be a selfish thing. The same way downing yourself doesn’t make you a humble person. Everyone has worth. The sanitation guy who wakes me up every morning, because he is yelling at the other sanitation guy right outside my window, has just as much worth as the Queen of England. In fact, I appreciate the sanitation guy more because he keeps my block from stinking and ensures I don’t oversleep.
Knowing your self-worth doesn’t mean you don’t do the “grunt” work, and it doesn’t always mean you get to be first or have it all. It does keep you moving forward though. You get to expand beyond what you already know even if those around you aren’t doing the same exact things- that’s ok. Start living like you know your value, and if you're not sure where to begin in assessing how you value yourself, start by listening to your speech. What are you telling yourself you are every day, and then how are you acting upon those words? Don’t be the one holding yourself back in any area of your life and start living like you know your value.
Said in Love,